by Frank Ippolito
Tulsa, OK – Jeff Munk, lead singer of (the now defunct) The Miss Fitz, a local Misfits tribute band, got quite a shock as he was dumpster diving and the manager of the restaurant caught him in the act.
To Munk’s surprise, the manager, Sam Armenta, decided that rather than call the police, he would do something even more humiliating: He would make Munk sing for his meal, specifically, Adele’s new single, “Hello.”
“I love that song,” Armenta said. “I’ve been playing it over and over and over since it came out, and I figured if I couldn’t have Adele sing it to me in person, this was the next best thing.”
As for Munk, he had absolutely no idea who Adele was and had never heard the song before. “I’m a hardcore punk, man. I don’t listen to anything on the radio. Hell, I don’t even have a radio,” he proudly declared. “And when he (Armenta) said he was going to make me sing that shit, my first thought was I wish he would have called the cops instead.”
When Munk told Armenta he knew neither the lyrics nor the melody of the megahit, Armenta was so determined to make the singer sing for his meal, he Googled the lyrics on his smartphone and played the karaoke version on his iPod, much to the hardcore punk’s dismay.
“I couldn’t fucking believe it,” Munk said. “I thought I was in the clear, but the dude had the music on his iPod! Who the fuck does that?”
After Munk failed to sing the song to Armenta’s liking, Armenta sang the song for the ex-lead singer so he could hear the melody for himself. “If you’re going to sing Adele, damn it, you’re going to sing Adele and do it right,” Armenta said.
Finally, after a grueling 30 minutes of rehearsing the song (and an impromptu duet with Armenta), Munk finally nailed it and was rewarded with his meal. “Fuck this, man. I’m never coming back here. I’d rather starve than have to sing that shit again,” Munk said as he walked away with a serving of spaghetti and chicken strips.
“I guess he did OK. I mean Adele is Adele, you know?” Armenta said. “I hope he comes back. There’s a Nicki Minaj song that I think would be more in his range.”