Yab Yum’s Horoscopes

Aries:
The elastic morning wings breed shaky minds.
Pay attention to where you put your keys.
Refrain from impulsive real estate investments.

Taurus:
The brave march terrified to battle.
Soften contact for internal discovery.
Sharpen your sword for a pending change.

Gemini:
Your time of the stars has arrived.
Carpe diem!
Buy yourself those shoes girl.

Cancer:
Be weary of false profits.
Onward must the horse gallop.
The tides suggest leisure by the pool.

 Leo:
Youth of all ages.
You are a lion.
Show them your teeth and roar.

Virgo:
Your distemper is black bile.
The tides have calmed.
Now may be the time to sail the seas.

Libra:
Where mountains carry the waters of the river,
The goat tells no tale.
It is very important to be punctual this month.

Scorpio:
Gaia’s resources depleted.
A vitamin wags the sad dog.
Tend to your garden.

Sagittarius:
A fooling of gold does not quench a desert thirst.
Save your purse and rest.
The night brings triumph.

Capricorn:
Saturn in contemplation.
Now is a good time to get organized.
The chameleon simply a chameleon.

Aquarius:
The throne of wise men is a lifelong journey.
Fear is merely a backwards misspelling of reef.
Patience, you may have to wait in line.

Pisces:
A picnic in the park may not appeal to you this month.
Consider scuba diving and hot-air balloon rides.
A mute leopard does not speak of fiction.

~

The Explosive June Issue

It’s finally here! The first of our summer edition’s.

The next one is not until August first, but we made sure to include enough fun to keep you busy till September. In addition, to the first of our 2012 summer editions, this issue also marks our third birthday. Three years of kick-ass Arizona music and arts coverage and it’s not going to stop. We love you. Enjoy!

In this issue:

Blood on the Dance Floor
Andrew Jackson Jihad
Adam Dumperfoo
Former Friends of Young Americans
Howard Hughes
Ladylike
YabYum answers, “The YabYum Six”
Authority Zero
The Cult of the Yellow Sign

…and so much more!

 Don’t forget to check out this issue’s features in our Directory of Directories